Before reading this post, please take some time to listen to the following video from Gordon B. Hinckley.
I was able to attend the 15th Annual UCAP Conference this past weekend. UCAP stands for: Utah Coalition Against Pornography.
The Essential Reason Porn is Wrong – Matt Fradd
Sex is good. Sexual desire is good. Love compels us to give of ourselves, however, lust compels us to take from others. We were made by love, for love, to love. God is love. Porn is always disappointing.
“Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind.”
“And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself.”
We are ALL children of God. Porn is degrading and those in the industry are used as objects for instant gratification. Matt shared the following video to show the importance of love: Kelly Clarkson – Piece by Piece
Young Adult Relationships – Dating and Marriage in the Porn Era – Sean & Alex Musil, Rachel Denton, Marcus Vanderholm and Dr. Adam Moore
Rachel told a story of a young man who told family members of his porn addiction. He wished he hadn’t because of their reaction. She goes on to say the family members did not show compassion or love to the young man. If someone comes to you and says they have an addiction, you should treat it like they just told you they have cancer. It’s fine to be shocked. It’s fine to be upset. However, you need to show love and compassion.
In regards to relationships, they discuss the best time to discuss pornography in a relationship. Trust and commitment need to be built. As relationships grow and you start to share more personal/serious issues, the conversation, although it may be uncomfortable, needs to be had. It should not just be a one-time conversation if you truly care about each other.
In regards to recovery… no matter how far you are down the road, the ditch is still just right off the road. Take time off to prepare for a great woman. You want someone to date you, not the portrayal of you. You have to take a leap of faith to talk about things that are shameful. Moderate pain now versus more serious pain down the road. Respond as a friend would respond. You are dealing with human beings. You need to be transparent. It’s best to have one full year of recovery before making a serious commitment.
Recovery is Real & Possible. If I Can Live in Recovery One Day at a Time, Anyone Can! – Eva Calvillo Gordon
Recovery starts when you acknowledge it’s an addiction. Recognize your feelings, be honest about them, go to Christ! He can take it from you. He wants to take it from us.
- Recognize you are out of control = HONEST.
- Reach out for help, Christ has the power and wants to help you = ACCOUNTABLE.
- Let Him help = HUMBLE.
When you reach crazy mode, relax, take a deep breathe… and JUST KEEP SWIMMING! Be in the present. Don’t look back and become depressed and don’t look too far ahead that you become anxious.
Relapse can happen when you’re not 100% honest and when you are centering your life on YOU, rather then centering your life on CHRIST!
Be patient. Serve others. Set boundaries for yourself. Make a plan. Have mentors and call them. Journal your emotions. Ask for angels to help you. Keep coming back. It works when you work and you are worth it!
A Generation’s Fight For Love – Clay Olsen
Join the movement and become a fighter. Love something that loves you back.
Stake Conference Recap –
- Personal Conversion: The first step is to go to church. You are able to grow closer to God. You are able to listen to other’s testimony’s. Someone may say something you need to hear.
- Scripture Study: All of us have time to read our scriptures. Prioritize your time. Your eternal life depends on it.
- Prayer: Everything will be alright. He is always watching out for us. Everything in our life happens for a reason.
- Pray for an opportunity to share. Use gospel language as we speak.
- Faith is a form of trust. Jesus helps us become better. We all face trials… big AND small. The atonement allows for sins of the past to stay in the past.
- We need to have faith, not to be healed, but to trust in Him.
- Trials will be a small moment. Endure life well. Our Savior fell below it all.
- We need to have the determination to let go of our sins. Bow down, repent of all of our sins, believe in Him.
- If we prepare for the sacrament, we can receive the help we need.
- If it’s important to us, it’s important to Christ. We must turn toward the Savior.
- God is light. He is perfect. He is love. There is no hate or darkness in Him.
- Jesus is our advocate. He defends us. Pray and ask of someone you need to forgive.
- The world is calling evil –> good and good –> evil. We need to push and get out of the head wind sometimes to move forward.
- We’ll have a change in our hearts if we do those small and simple things.
- Morning exercise. Read Book of Mormon. Read Jesus the Christ. Study the priesthood. Good media. Change bad songs. Morning, throughout the day, before dinner and evening prayer. Serve (roommates, coworkers, friends, home teaching assignments, family). Social media use.
- Every temple complete lessen’s the power of Satan.
- The temple is a place of tender mercies.
- Get to the temple more frequently.
- There is a lot of work to be done… even in UTAH!
- Let your light shine upon the world. Be a Latter-day Saint and not a Sunday Mormon.
- Choosing to go where we need to be is a sign of our love toward God.
- Recognize the power our choices have.
- Be around good friends.
- Use our time wisely.
- Participate in activities that invite the Spirit.
- We don’t need to fear when we have the Holy Ghost as our constant companion.
- Small things turn into lasting things.
- We need to feel and be clean.
- Don’t ever go to bed without praying and reading at least one verse.